My Coming Out Post

This may not come as a shock to my few blog readers, but I’ve been feeling increasingly more desirous of sharing my political views. Gasp. Will that change the way our country is governed? No. Will it change anyone’s mind? No. Nor am I trying to. This post is mostly for my own peace of mind, and that’s it.

I have been back and forth countless times on whether or not I really wanted to share this information, how beneficial it would be, and If I was ready to likely become scorned by many. But then the other night while thinking back over the news headlines I had read that day I thought, “Gosh, it would just be nice to know that there are other people out there who get it. Who understand how I’m feeling and aren’t afraid to share their views.” It’s always nice to just hear a resounding gong of your own opinion, amiright? Joking aside, with today’s Left-leaning mainstream media, increasing amounts of censorship and the public tearing down of anyone that voted for President Trump, it’s just nice to know we aren’t on islands all by ourselves.

I’ve kept my political views pretty quiet and to myself over the past year especially, and even quieter during the election season. Was it because I was ashamed of who I was planning to cast my vote for? Or was it because I knew that if I spoke up I would be debated, hated and scorned by people whose acceptance I’m apparently not ready to stop seeking? While recently reflecting on this, (after the election was over and decided) I realized that this must be how it feels for those who experience same-sex attraction to “come out” to their relatives. Gosh Kelsey, how insensitive of you! How dare you compare your political views to others’ sexuality!

Let me explain: from what I’ve gathered, those who experience same-sex attraction are afraid that they will be disowned by family and friends, cut out of social circles, and will live in fear and shame.

Can someone please tell me how “coming out” as a someone who adheres to most Republican Party core values and viewpoints does not warrant these same feelings? I know that many of my family members disagree with my political leanings, I have seen more than a couple of Facebook posts saying “If you voted for Trump, get the **** off my page and unfriend me,” and I truly believe that the reason more people have not spoken up for their Right-leaning views is simply because they know they will be unfriended, unfollowed and disliked as soon as they do. And especially those who may own their own small business, they are afraid at what it would cost them to announce these views to those who dissent.

If you’ve read this far and haven’t gathered that I do not pledge allegiance to Joe Biden or the Left, then let me spell it out for you: I am not excited for the next 4 (potentially 8) years with Joe and Kamala at the helm of our great nation. I have said several times since January 20th, “I am going to do my very best to listen, dialogue and seek to understand,” because I just witnessed 4 solid years of people that disagreed with our President refusing to do those three things — employing such hashtags as “#notmypresident and blaming every single societal ill on Donald Trump (refusing to acknowledge the fact that he actually made good and beneficial changes for our country, and the world!). And then Joe Biden gave what I considered to be a decent Inaugural Address, and one of his lines stuck out to me: “Disagreement should not lead to disunity.” GOSH how true that is. I truly pray that because I disagree with someone, does not mean that I need to be disunited from them. It is OK to disagree and work towards a solution.

And then he signed 17 Executive Orders on his first day in office.

And then a whopping 25 more within a week.

And something tells me he isn’t quite finished yet…

I understand making good on campaign promises, really I do. If I were running for an office like this I’d want to take care of as much as possible as I could, too. But for a “very devout” Catholic who is running on this platform of “unity!” I guess I’d expect he wouldn’t pick one of the (if not the?) issue that divides our country the most and sign an Executive Order to reverse the Mexico City Policy within his first week of taking office. The Mexico City Policy prevented our tax dollars from funding abortions overseas. He claimed that “he is not doing anything new here, just going back to the way things were before Trump was president,” but I ask you, does before Trump necessarily mean better? I’m not saying everything Trump did was great, but can we not make it even better than it was before?

Joe, by signing several of these orders, you have proven to the people of our country that true unity is not actually what you seek, but that you are a puppet to the Leftist agenda. I have so many thoughts on these orders, but I hope that time honestly tells us (and when I say time, I really mean the Mainstream Media) the fallout from these decisions you have made and are putting into effect. (Like the thousands of jobs already being lost due to the pipeline shutdown, the fact you have no real plan for COVID…etc).

I’m not a political analyst and for that reason have wanted to keep my mouth shut. But I simply can’t sit back any more and continue swallowing spoonful after spoonful of hateful rhetoric without speaking my mind.

As always, this may be my last post for a long time, or perhaps I’m only getting started on sharing my political leanings (it is surprisingly cathartic!). Either way, whether you agree with me or not, feel free to come back and dialogue with me. There’s no point in silencing those we disagree with, that will never lead to true unity in our country, and in our hearts.

An Open Letter to the Smithsonian Museum

This morning I opened my email and saw that an inherently racist statue depicting Theodore Roosevelt subjugating Native American and African American peoples is being removed from the Museum of Natural History in New York City.

This led to some thinking and an email that I quickly drafted and sent to the Smithsonian museum, also regarding a racist statue that needs removal.

I try not to get too “political” on my blog, but as I’ve been hearing over and over again that race issues are “not political they are human rights,” so, too, are the rights of all human persons, whether in or outside of the womb. The right to life is not a political one: it is an inherent right.

Here’s the email I sent, and if you also feel strongly about this issue, I encourage you to do the same (but please don’t copy and paste my email).

Thanks,

Kelsey

—————————————————————————————————————————————

Good morning to the Smithsonian Museum,

As I opened my New York Times daily briefing email this morning I read that a Theodore Roosevelt statue is being removed from the Museum of Natural History in New York City. I think this is a wise move as our country moves forward to root out the systemic racism that our country has embedded in its very core.

In addition to this, there are other statues nationwide that should also be addressed in whether or not they remain a public icon representing our great nation’s history and progress towards becoming a more accepting and open society of all races and cultures.

While it is argued that the advent of birth control and abortion has aided in our progress in becoming more liberated and independent women, it is important to remember that Margaret Sanger, founder of Planned Parenthood and vehement eugenicist and racist, was not only about the liberation of women, but also the “extermination of the negro population.”

This piece is a dated opinion piece, but worth taking into consideration: https://www.frc.org/op-eds/margaret-sanger-racist-eugenicist-extraordinaire.

It is well known that Margaret Sanger used the guise of “helping women” to target low-income and largely African American populations with abortion clinics because she truly wanted to create a “superior race” and “weed out” the problems (i.e. black people) from the US population. She was not shy or subversive about stating these facts plainly and publicly.

I hope that as our country works towards unification and integration of our beautiful and diverse population, you would also consider please removing the statue of Margaret Sanger who did not represent this same unity and integration. Perhaps you could consider sending it to the PPFA Global headquarters in NYC, as then it would not have far to travel.

Thank you for your consideration and I appreciate your time as your incredible museum represents what our country’s people elevate as true art and important history.

Kind regards,

Kelsey Kersting

There’s no such thing.

Full disclosure: I’m sharing my thoughts in this post about infant and child loss. I have not experienced it personally but pray for those that have and would not wish it upon my worst enemy. If this is a sensitive topic please do not read this post.

“There’s no such thing as other people’s children.”

This is a statement I have felt deeply in the past several months, and especially do now. Social media can be a blessing in many ways, but also be a curse. I now follow several women for the very fact that they have lost a child. I have watched from afar as they learn and share their grief with the world, share videos and photos of their precious angel, or even just share bible verses that bring them comfort. I have grappled with this so much because when I see their reality, I feel deeply sad. I cry big, fat tears. I question God how He could have let something like this happen to this family? To these parents?! To the siblings? And some of the time, I don’t even know these children, have never met them or their families, and am a complete stranger to this situation.

So Kelsey, why don’t you just unfollow? Quit looking. It’s none of your business anyway.

Because their reality is also my reality. The loss of any child at any stage feels like the loss of my own. To leave them in the dust feels like I’m taking a part of my heart, along with theirs, and burying it in the mud. It feels like I’m saying, “I couldn’t handle your reality so I stopped thinking about it.” It absolutely is my business to pray for this grieving mother who is living the nightmare none of us ever thought would happen to us. It’s my business to grieve alongside her, because if I’ve learned one thing, it’s that being a third party to child loss can also be a lonely place. Especially when you don’t know the parents well, or are just getting to know them, or maybe you see the family at church but don’t have a relationship built. I know the first thought on so many good-hearted people’s minds is, “what can I do for this family? How can I help?” and this is exactly how I feel. “If I can just do something, I’ll feel better, it will be okay.” But the reality is, at the end of the day it’s not okay. We can go home and “hug our babies tighter” and we absolutely should. But even after doing that the gaping hole remains: our earth is one beautiful child less, and somewhere there is a grieving family learning a new normal.

If I can’t do anything to physically comfort a family in their time of grief, my only desire is to be emotionally connected with them, mourning with them and offering my tears as prayers that theirs can cease, and my sorrow that theirs can be turned into joy. The heartbreak you experience as an outsider should not be diminished or ignored because this did not happen to you. Your grief can be turned into love poured into that family so they know they are not alone nor is their child forgotten.

Before I had children I never wondered about the things I wonder about now when I receive such devastating news:  what is it like to continue caring for your other children when you had to say goodbye to one of them? How do you fall asleep at night not haunted by the “what ifs” and “why did this happen”s? How were you able to feed your family dinner that night? How do you get yourself ready in the morning? How do you continue living having seen what you saw, and felt what you have felt?

When thinking about all of these scenarios, and everything that goes into parenting, especially little ones, I instantly think: that parent has a deep interior strength that not even they knew they had. And I wish with every fiber in my being that they did not need to pull from this interior strength and that we could wipe every tear away and give them back the life they had. If I could write a letter to all the parents I know experiencing the unthinkable, it would probably be something like this:

Dear Grieving Parent,

To say, “I’m sorry” doesn’t seem like enough. 

To not say it at all seems worse.

I don’t know what to say, because regardless of what I say I can’t take away your pain. I can’t make your family feel whole again. I can’t undo the nightmares you’ve lived through. But I promise you this: I will cry alongside you and grieve your heartache with you.

I will never be too busy to sit with you and listen, or be with you in silence, understanding that sometimes there are simply no words to be said.

I won’t pretend that because days, months or years have gone by it doesn’t still feel like yesterday that your world was turned upside down, or that because I don’t know you I won’t pray for you. 

The world will never forget your child. God will never forget you.

I’m so very sorry.

Love,

A mom 

I never thought I’d say this, or that I wouldn’t.

I went back to work.

After 3 1/2 years of being a stay at home mom to our wonderful boys, I decided to apply, interview and accept a position that will whisk me away four days a week, and occupy a good portion of my waking hours. I’ve been telling people slowly about this transition, and decided I should probably make an electronic record of it, for safe keeping ;).

For the last month or so, several family members and friends have asked me the exact same question, nearly verbatim: “Kelsey, how do you feel about starting your job?!” And now that I’ve officially started I can assure you that I still don’t exactly know how I feel about it. I absolutely do miss the boys during the day, of course. (Do I miss the tantrums and timeouts and stubborn battles? Not so much.) Feelings of the classic mom guilt have waxed and waned, but overall I’m excited and feel alive to be starting something new and breathing life into our family, and myself, with this new role. It will take time, lots of time, to learn our new normal and navigate the transition. But you know what, I’m here for it. Lee is here for it. And obviously, the boys are here for it.

This week, the most surreal moment was on Monday morning when I got in the van, drove away and closed the garage door knowing I wouldn’t be back for over 8 hours. And that whatever happens with the boys, is going to be OK. We are incredibly blessed that a friend of ours is coming to our house for the time being to take care of the boys, making the transition that much smoother. Really, what an incredible gift.

After just four days of this madness, I will say that the little amount of time that I’ve seen the boys has been so crazy! Just about 4 hours/day with them being up just before I leave and still getting to bed on time. It makes me feel more for Lee when he’d tell me that he wants to spend more time with them after work–now I understand! And because I want to keep a note of this: there were a couple of days this week when Isaac and I had zero negative interactions. Z-E-R-O. I know that not every day will be that way, but I don’t want to forget these moments! Jacob has been lavishing me in kisses after work, Isaac has been genuinely happy, and Lee and I have been bingeing The Masked Singer in the evenings after they go to bed. So basically, everyone wins.

We talked and made a rough outline of what we want our weeks to look like, day by day, since we know we will be pressed for time in the evenings, but also want to make sure we are taking care of our full selves and our home, too. This week we didn’t hit all of them, the toys weren’t put away as they usually are every day, but the victories we did have felt monumental and gave me a little hit of adrenaline, telling me that we can do this. I can do this.

I don’t have anything reflective or monumental to record here, just that sometimes life throws us curveballs and we can make our own decision in how we respond. I’m also a firm believer in seasons of life, and right now I’m entering a new season. Please pray for our family as we transition!

Me, on my second day at the office.

The days are long.

“The days are long but the years are short.”

This quote has been my mantra for the past several weeks, maybe even months.

A lot has changed since I last wrote; I looked at the date on my last post and Isaac wasn’t even a year old yet, and now he’s two and has a 4 month old baby brother! I can’t believe it.

I won’t even attempt to “catch you up” on our life because that’s not why I’m here. I’m here because both boys are taking a blessed nap, we’ve had a particularly difficult week, and I just need to see where my mind directs my fingers as I type. Before Jacob joined our family I was particularly accustomed to having those glorious couple of uninterrupted hours in the afternoon to sew, clean, or do whatever it is my heart fancied.

And now we have an infant. And sometimes he needs me during that time ;). I’ve noticed myself tending more often towards silence while sewing so I can think, rather than listen to some of my favorite podcasts or even music. The uninterrupted quiet is often what I need but I’ve noticed my thoughts typically tend to wander toward self pitying and wondering how long I have before someone wakes up? Fifteen minutes? Two hours? The uncertainty can lead me to either productivity or paralysis, and while I was cleaning up after putting the boys down today I thought, “I can’t be productive unless I process.” So here I am, processing.

Life with two boys, three if you count Lee. It’s special and unique and I feel a connection every time I see #boymom because it’s like we have an unknown ability to relate even without knowing one another or speaking at all. Our children are exclusively boys and it’s a beautiful thing.

This morning I spent time with some friends who also have little ones, two of which are just over a year old. I caught myself watching these little semi-new walkers curiously and slowly make their way around the arboretum play area and caught myself mourning and missing that stage with Isaac. I looked over at him as he was running in circles and trying to dive headfirst into a koi pond (why there is a koi pond in a children’s play area I am clueless) and found myself wishing for the first time, “if only he were still in that stage.” The slow-walking, not-yet-defiant, the-world-is-my-oyster, I’m-a-big-boy (but really not) stage. It was over as quick as it came, and I hardly remember it.

The years are short.

But it’s just so true. These little tiny years are so short, and even though some days I am sailing through them with an easy-breezy toddler and a sweet little baby, there are other days that seem to never end. And you know what? I truly wouldn’t change them for the world. And it’s important for me to remember that and keep calling it to mind. Our children are precious gifts from God and I have the privilege to help raise and teach these two boys, in every thing that I do. A lot of things have been happening lately, sad things, horrific things, that have caused me to reflect deeply upon how important my family is to me and would I continue to trust God if something like that happened to one of my children? I really pray that I am able to and I’m writing this down so I can remember it.

I haven’t decided yet if I’ll start blogging more often, or only when the spirit moves me. I do very much enjoy the peace and quiet that comes with sewing, but I also enjoy processing and think that’s a little better for my mental and emotional well-being.

To end this I’ll share a quick note on what both boys are doing, because these days fly by and I never jot them down:

Isaac (2 yrs, 1 month)

• Loves playing in the sand table, at the train table at the library and drawing circles with chalk (mommy circle, daddy circle, Isaac circle, Jacob circle).
• His favorite snacks are fruit snacks, animal crackers, popsicles and also anything that anyone else is eating.
• Every night he prays for “cake yummy” before going to bed.
• He’s learning his ABC’s and it’s pretty adorable to watch his wheels turning when we sing the song.
• He loves to read and his favorite books (today) are: Papa, Please Get the Moon For Me, Another Monster at the end of this Book, Ten Little Caterpillars and Dr. Seuss’ ABC’s.

  

  Drawing circles and grass. Clearly 🙂 

Jacob (4 months)

• Wearing 9 month clothes.
• Just started rolling from back to tummy.
• Giggles whenever we change his clothes (definitely POLAR opposite from Isaac who cried when we did this!).
• Smiles almost every time I or daddy walk into the room.
• Loves bouncing in the jumperoo.
• Killin’ it in the cute department.

  

  Our favorite morning spot.

 

I’m a woman, hear me roar.

This is a post that, in my perspective, is long overdue.

(BTW I am going to completely ignore the fact that I have considered completely eradicating this corner of the internet multiple times over the past 8 months and pretended it didn’t exist. You’d do well to do the same.)

In the past couple of years a lot of life changes have happened for me. I changed jobs. I moved to Iowa. I got engaged, then married. We bought a house. We had a baby. We are now learning how to parent a beautiful, happy and energetic baby.

One other change that happened in that span of time is that Lee and I learned a method of Natural Family Planning called the Creighton Method (referred to as ‘Creighton’ throughout this post). I have wanted to write on this subject since our very first meeting with our Creighton Practitioner, but have often considered myself inadequate, not smart enough, or maybe I just need to stay quiet because who am I to impose my beliefs on anyone? Or, I’ve hardly even used it, do I really believe that this works and is best for our family?

It has now been two years and two months since our charting experience began and I feel more empowered about my body than ever before. We feel that this is absolutely the best thing for our family, and rather than imposing beliefs, I am writing this to share something that has been so, so positive for me as a woman, and for our marriage.

Today I listened to my friend Claire’s podcast, The Catholic Feminist and her interview with Leah Jacobson, founder of the Guiding Star Movement.  To listen to the interview click here. While listening with tear-filled eyes I wanted to pause and record every single thing that came out of Leah’s mouth, or rewind it and simply hear certain sentences over and over again. I was dreaming up Facebook posts, conversations, and for the first time after a year filled with “feminist” marches and being bombarded with the lie that Planned Parenthood is the only true women’s advocate, I felt heard. I felt like my view on what I believe to be real women’s health care was understood and affirmed.

I am blessed to be in a city where a Guiding Star clinic has recently been developed, and after listening to this interview I wish all women could know the beauty of their own bodies, their fertility and also all of the things that NFP is not.

NFP is not the Rhythm method! Exclamation point!

NFP is not oppressive to women.

NFP is not abstinence until you decide you want to get pregnant. (If I had a dollar for, “So you’re doing NFP? You’re probably already pregnant then, huh?”)

NFP is not something that is only meant for Catholics.

But in reality, NFP is so much more than it is not.

NFP is scientific. Research, studies and years of collecting data and experiences have gone into the creation of the various methods. The Pope did not develop it out of thin air.

NFP, particularly the Creighton Model (as I am most familiar with this one) is over 99% effective at avoiding AND achieving desired pregnancies. And on top of that, charting your cycle (which is what women or couples actually do in NFP) has helped countless women recognize underlying symptoms for conditions such as PCOS, infertility, endometriosis and so many others.

NFP is safe, completely natural, and teaches women about how their bodies work while empowering them to make informed decisions.

NFP is pro-woman, pro-family, and pro-marriage.

I’ll be honest. Throughout the entire Women’s March on Washington and the social media blast from many acquaintances and friends on what women really “need,” I felt sad. I felt like a strange anomaly, like my voice didn’t matter, and I marveled at how many women marched in order to have the right to kill their own offspring. I felt heard when I read this post from my favorite blogger, but when all was said and done my thoughts kept coming back to, “what can I do to share what I’ve learned about fertility awareness??” and “I just want these women to realize how amazing their bodies are, and that they don’t need pills, shots or devices to empower them!”

We started charting with Creighton shortly after we became engaged. Other than both Lee AND I learning how my body works (I learned things about my body that I should’ve been learning in sex education in high school!), our ability to communicate about uncomfortable subjects skyrocketed, and we both agree that our marriage is stronger because of it.*

Photo taken from @thecatholicfeminist on Instagram

If you have time today, or in the near future, I recommend listening to the podcast interview with Leah Jacobson. She explains what the Guiding Star Movement is and how it came about, she talks about how NFP differs from hormonal birth control and she challenges what is currently referred to as “real women’s health care.”

Click here to listen!

*This is not condemning couples who don’t practice NFP and saying that their marriages aren’t strong. I only speak from personal experience and how we have benefited from the Creighton Method.

Three days posthumous.

Okay okay, that is an extremely depressing title for this post. But the other night as I tossed and turned, unable to sleep, I thought up blog post after post in my head, and that was the main thought I kept coming back to:  death. And before you begin to think that I am referring to the fact that Donald Trump was elected President of our nation, that is not the death I am referring to. The death I am referring to is the division and hatred that has been sewn in us over the past several months and is now coming to the surface as so many lash out against the results from Tuesday’s election.

As I laid awake, I did as any normal person would do when they can’t sleep:  I opened up my least favorite yet most addicting social media platform–Facebook. I scrolled and scrolled and kept ingesting the poison:  status after status, comment after derogatory comment regarding the “shameful,” “terrible,” and “embarrassing” outcome of Tuesday’s election. So much disappointment, so much hopelessness, and so many individuals that I deeply care for who felt personally attacked by all those who did not vote in their favor. My heart broke and part of me believes that our nation died a little bit with the outcome of the election. The weeks and weeks of political smear campaigns that so many of us consumed, starting to believe more bad than good about people. Believing the lie that no matter which party took office, their flaws would be the only thing that mattered and any amount of good they had previously done or promised for the future would not matter at all.

Now, I’m not saying that I am pleased with the outcome of the election. My initial reaction was not shock, as it was for so many of the political analysts and “pundits” out there (whoever they may be). My reaction was deep sadness, knowing that so many people put their faith in politics, and believe that this person has zero capability to run this country (and yes, I’m sad to say that I counted myself among them). On top of that, I was saddened that out of all of the citizens of this great nation, these were our top choices for leaders. Yes I am one of “those millennials” who voted third party, knowing that our system is set up in such a way that my candidate had no chance of claiming a victory. But I truly took the Pope’s words to heart when asked how Americans should vote:  “Pray, and vote your conscience.” So I did just that, and have no regrets.

I wish I could help sew hope where there is none, joy where there is sadness and woe, and unity where hatred and division reign. But right now, with wounds so fresh and so raw, I just want to say this:

To those who voted and your candidates are taking (or retaking) office: congratulations. Be a good sport and know that there are many who are hurting, afraid and deeply disappointed. Nobody enjoys the sour taste of defeat, and by treating anyone lesser or like a “loser,” you are now the cause of this disunity our country is currently facing, not Donald Trump.

To those who voted and your candidates are not taking office:  I understand the feeling of rejection, defeat and fear, and rather than letting this tear us apart, I pray that we can unite under a common cause and rise above it. I don’t know what the future holds, but I know that there is more to life than the presidency, and in the days, weeks and years ahead, I hope that all of us will be gladly surprised.

These are my thoughts. I pray for an end to violent protests, unity among all citizens of our country, and for policies that favor all peoples to be enacted.

Also, as a tip to our future president, it is AN historic, not A historic. Keep that in mind for the first State of the Union Address.

#grammarpolice

May God bless America!

Motherhood.

So here we are, almost three months in and I’ve been a little slow on the updating. My sincerest apologies, and I hope that changes soon. The more I write, the more I want to write, but lately we’ve just been going going going, and it’s nice to finally see a month of at-home down time.

First, as much as I absolutely looove being a mom to our sweet and wonderful little babe, I can’t tell you how much I count down to 4:15 every day when I know we are on the cusp of the return of the Other Parent. I am having a lot of fun being a mom, but also enjoy an occasional uninterrupted shower, some time to do some cutting and sewing without taking diaper breaks, and even enjoy making dinner more than I ever have before! It’s amazing how nice it is to do something more “adult” than washing poopy diapers, making baby items and baby talking all day. It’s fun to relay that baton in the evenings, and I’m fairly certain that daddy loves himself some time with our smiley babe, as well.

Seriously, that face.

And on the Isaac front, people continually ask me, “Is he a good baby?” and I never really understood that question until he came along. I always wondered, are they asking if the baby is obedient? I mean, it’s a baby! But. Now I get it. And to answer that question simply and humbly, yes, he is an exceptionally good baby — we are very blessed. We have yet to hear him cry for absolutely no reason. He cries when he’s hungry, when he’s tired and when he wants to be swaddled up (which usually means he’s tired). Practicing the “shhhhhhh” when he cries in the evenings usually calms him down within seconds, and he’s a great nurser. I’m definitely not trying to brag, or make the claim that “our kid is better than your kid.” Nearly every night Lee and I discuss the fact that not all babies are this “easy” and we are definitely blessed! On top of that, he’s so freaking cute, like, too cute for words. I mean just look at this: 

Yeah, we’re pretty smitten.

As of late Isaac has been sleeping for longer stretches at night. Five hours! Seven hours! Anything more than three is magical. Though I still definitely enjoy my morning cup o’ joe just as much as ever. I know I’m a better mom because of it.

I had hoped to put up a one year anniversary post now almost a month ago, but we were busy traveling and revisited a cabin near our honeymoon spot on the North Shore near Grand Marais, MN! It was a beautiful and much needed getaway, and Isaac did really well in the car for the 7+ hour drive there and back. Highlights of the trip include an accidental 7-mile hike, calling 911 on said hike, and seeing some amazing fall foliage. 

Unfortunately we still have yet to see a moose, but we’re holding out for our next trip 😉 We did lots of hiking, enjoyed our quaint cabin very near to Lake Superior, and had lots of quality time. Overall, a very successful trip.

Currently Isaac is starting to interact with things in front of him, and that is all too fun to see. He is being more and more generous with his precious smiles, and all four grandparents are completely smitten. We’ve been cloth diapering for nearly six weeks, and it’s going really well. I’ll write a separate post with my thoughts on that, because I know you’re all so interested in my thoughts on baby poop. Big wink. But, in all seriousness, for those of you considering cloth diapering I want to encourage you that it’s not as bad as it may seem from the outset! I’m always happy to answer any questions, but since I’ve got quite a bit to say (spoiler alert) it might be nice to direct curious cloth diaper seekers to one simple blog post.

Lastly, I’m currently working on a special surprise project, and I hope to have that finished and announce that in the next couple of weeks, too!

Life will never be the same.

Because six weeks ago today a beautiful baby boy was born to us, and now no matter how hard anyone may try, I will always be a mother and my heart will continue growing in love for this human at lightning speed.

Isaac was born a whopping ten days early and he weighed in at 6 lbs and 13 oz of pure perfection. As soon as the doctor held him up and I laid my eyes on him for the first time, my heart was filled to overflowing with every possible emotion. Tears quickly filled my eyes and I knew for certain that something inside of me changed, and this kind of change would be permanent. As I looked on him my mind was racing:  this is the child that silently grew inside of me for the past nine months, sharing my every meal and every sip of coffee, leading me to daydream about his features, his personality, every little thing about him. He already amazed me by starting out as a mere two cells — 50/50 mom and dad.  We watched him grow from a blueberry all the way to a cantaloupe and beyond. The only thing I was absolutely sure of up until that moment was that there was a baby inside of me, and that at some point, he would come out and surprise us with all of his perfect little features, and probably have mom’s nose, based on the 20-week ultrasound images.

Life with Isaac for the first six weeks have been a blur mixed with excitement, joy, frustration, visitors and a lot of learning. Throw in some Netflix, a little sewing and lots of snuggling and other than the obvious hours spent feeding him each day, that pretty much sums up the past month and a half.  I feel incredibly blessed to be able to stay at home with him and spend our days together, figuring each other out and at times, counting down the minutes until dad comes home from work. We have had an amazing village bringing us meals, offering us love and support and showering Isaac in kisses, gifts and lots of snuggles. We are truly blessed.

It’s incredible to me how big of an event it is to bring a baby home from the hospital. Where in this case there once lived just two individuals, there are now three, and no longer having the assistance from the nurses and hospital staff around the clock, we had to just start figuring it out. Highway 218 is a road we travel frequently, and now every single time we go anywhere on 218 I think of the day we brought Isaac home and he screamed almost the entire way down the short stretch of the highway until we got home. I no longer drive past the hospital and think of it as just “one of the hospitals in town.” Now that is the hospital where Isaac was born, and where we became a family of three. What a special milestone to remember!

A few of the things about our first few weeks with Isaac (I probably would have written more about these things had I started blogging right when we got home…but let’s be real–baby. snuggles.):

• Nursing. Isaac might be the slowest eater ever..but I’ve already noticed him picking up speed! In just six weeks! And he is definitely filling out, which we are very grateful for.
• Our favorites so far: swaddle blankets, the Rock ‘n Play, all the homemade burp cloths we made for him ahead of time, Carters NB onesies, the sleep sheep, the boppy pillow, pacifiers, the animal party bouncer seat and the beautiful homemade changing table from my dad.
• All the cute noises. Yawns, sneezes, hiccups, burps and even his cries are adorable…sometimes. At other times it’d be nice if he just told us what he needs!
• Things he hates:  baths, diaper changes (though he’s getting better about this!) and being hungry. He also hates tummy time after about 5-10 minutes, depending on how full he is. He reallllly hates being hungry, but if his tummy is full he can usually withstand a solid 10 minutes of tummy time before the wailing begins.
• Sleeping in his own room. This one was a tough transition…for me! Not him. The night before his 1-month birthday I laid him in his crib after the last nightly feeding while we got ready for bed ourselves. We came back and he was fast asleep, so that’s when we decided to turn on the video monitor and see how he did in his own space. Turns out he does just fine. It’s just me who constantly reaches over for the receiver to see what he’s doing and is he asleep yet and maybe he needs mom to hold him a little more?? But nope. We turn on that sleep sheep and he’s out within a few minutes, that thing is like crack for babies (at least our baby).
• Sleeping in general. The kid still sleeps a lot. He slept almost the entire time we were in the hospital, and the first few days (maybe even couple of weeks?) at home. In fact, he’s asleep right now. The kid loves his naps as much as he loves to eat. Usually only hunger wakes him up from his naps. Loud music at a wedding reception, going to church, going for walks and other such loud noises seem to have no effect on his ability to remain asleep. He doesn’t quite sleep through the night, but he is starting to no longer wake up at 1 or 2 and is waiting until almost 4 am (3 nights in a row now!), which means we get a solid 5 hours of sleep before feeding him–I’ll take it! I also really know he’s fast asleep when he’s got one arm, or even two, up over his head. It might be one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen.
• Our vocabulary. Since Isaac has been born Lee and I have used the word “cute” more than we ever have in our entire lives. And that word makes up about 90% of all the words we use. So that describes how we feel about him. But, the proof is in the pudding, just check out some of the cuteness below (or in my IG feed, which as plennnty of pictures already!).
• Resemblance: both of our parents each see us in him, so it’s hard to tell (though I kind of think he looks like mama!) However, after seeing my brother’s baby picture, Isaac is almost identical! Dangit Kevin! Stealing our thunder.
• The face he makes when he’s going to poop. It’s basically the best.

And now enough of the boring words. Here are a few of my favorites of the first few weeks, for the boy who made me a mama:

Our first family picture. I don’t think either of us have ever been prouder than this moment!

Coming into his home for the first time!

The baptism

Someone was OUT for a nap in the crib. I turned on the sleep sheep, walked downstairs and came back and this is the glorious sight I beheld.

One month pic. Finally growing into his giant hands.

And one from today: his 6-week birthday.

Nesting galore.

11 days and counting people. Eleven. Days.

Until baby’s “due date,” that is. I suppose he will come when he has had the appropriate talking with my body and decides it’s time to exit. Until then, he seems to be enjoying practicing for the 2032 Olympics gymnastics in utero. Though can we just please take a moment and acknowledge how freaking awesome Team USA is for women’s gymnastics?! Lee and I got to watch a few hours of Olympic going-ons last night and it was awesome. I not-so-secretly wish I could just sit and sew and watch the Olympics all day… but hey, maybe next week! This is my last week in the office, after all…

But, this post comes to you a la nesting mode central. Unfortunately I don’t have many photos to share from the weekend, but can I take a second and acknowledge Lee’s parents for all they helped us accomplish in two short days??

Father and son duo working away. This post results in us having a functioning clothesline! (It’s retractable, so we won’t always have a clothesline on our deck…don’t worry 😉

With their help we stocked a freezer with meals (13 to be exact…but many are casseroles which means they will make multiple meals for just the two of us!), baked a few batches of cookies (also for the freezer…because let’s be real–cookies.), finished serging up the cloth wipes I cut a few weeks ago, put in a post for our very own clothesline (!!!!), pulled weeds and dead rose bushes from around our house, helped build some end tables, and seriously much, much more. When those Kersting’s come to town they don’t mess around, they get sh*t done. While Lee and both of his parents were hard at work I was helping here and there, but making sure that baby and I got the rest and breaks we needed, and also spent the appropriate amount of time in AWE at how much was happening before our very eyes. And now that there are plenty of freezer meals stocked up, I can feel okay about just wanting to keep sewing! Also, did I mention that we literally went out and bought a deep freeze and that it’s slowly filling up? We decided we should probably get one on Saturday morning, and by Saturday afternoon we had gone to Sears and made a purchase! Huzzah!

My project this weekend was making a changing pad cover. And that took about an hour after all was said and done, though since it was my first I think I could easily whip another one of these bad boys out in much less time!

Ta da! My first attempt with using elastic, too! And how about that beautiful cherry changing table built by my own pops?? 

After that I obviously had to keep sewing and made some more burp cloths and bibs for baby, since I realized lately that if I’m making these for other people, we should probably be well-stocked, too! Amiright? So making some more of those over the next two weeks will be how I continue nesting…unless of course I find some other new thing I want to make! Lee also reminded me of the Christmas fabrics I stocked up on post-holiday season last year with the high hopes of making a Christmas tree skirt, throw pillows, and maybe even stockings? Who knows. Those might not get done this year, but I do have the patterns and prints ready to go!

Other than that, not much else to report, nary a bump pic for you (we’ve been s-l-a-c-k-i-n on taking those–sorry mom!). Lee’s already got a reminder to take one tonight! 38 weeks, can you believe it?

Happy Monday, friends 🙂